These past few weeks I have felt useless- that I can never get it right- that no matter how hard I try, I will still fail- and that life is full of more down's than up's. Well I was listening to a song by Relient K called "More Than Useless" and it talks about how even during these weeks when we are being told we are worthless, and feel like we are just wasting away life, GOD tells us MUCH differently. He assures that we have a purpose that He created us for. He wants us to love ourselves so that we will be able to love others and life- even for the low, empty, lonely times.
In my daily devotion sent to my email, there was a quote in there that really stuck out to me- "The temptations that promise pleasure and excitement never deliver anything but disappointment and shame. The moral shortcuts we take because it seems easier only make things worse. If you are growing tired of trying to be good, maybe you should quit trying and start believing." That quote hit me like a ton of bricks. I feel like so many times I try so hard to be the way God wants me to be, when He is saying the whole time "My child, be who I created you to be. I love you. You are of great worth to me. Live the life I have set before you, and follow the path I have laid. Do this in love." - Love your Heavenly Father.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
One of the hardest challenges in life for me is to "turn the other cheek". SOOO many times I want to give the people that have hurt me a dose of their own medicine, but Jesus instructs us, as Christians, to turn the other cheek. I'm struggling with this right now, because deep down I'm dying inside- and I'm sick of it. I feel like if I just get revenge on who I wanna get revenge on, all the hurt will go away.. but unfortunately it doesn't work like that- which is what I'm continually reminding myself. A problem that I'm having with this is that I don't want to be a door mat anymore... I am strong, and I need to stand up for myself. But when I finally do... people are telling me I am in the wrong- when it's completely obvious that the other is too. It's just so confusing. And I'm tired of all of it.
Posted by CB at 2:15 PM
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Whoever said that there's strength in numbers, I've found was only talking about select issues in life. For instance, when someone hurts you, it helps to have your friends, and it makes you stronger. But then when it comes to facing life in general is when the "numbers" fade out, and you have to find the inner strength to get through each day. I mean people are there for you, but the place they can't enter is your heart- where your inner strength is. Like someone once told me after a hard breakup- "You've just gotta pull yourself up by your bootstraps and keep on walkin". Right now I'm struggling with that, but hopefully with time, things will get better. I'm looking at it from an exercising perspective. For example, when you go to the gym for the first time you can't expect to bench press 200 lbs. It takes time, and work- repeated work, which in time will make you stronger. That is what I plan to do, and this blog post will be my reminder on those days when I'm having a hard time "pulling up by my bootstraps".
Posted by CB at 8:57 PM